We all know what love feels like. The emotion of love is intense and can be all consuming! From the love we feel for our family members to the love we feel towards our mate. Love takes on many forms throughout our lives and we use the word love in many settings and situations. I hear people say they love a certain kind of food, or they love a sports team, etc., and I’m sure they do, but is that really love? I hear teenagers tell me they love the person they are dating and I hear people say they love their job, but oftentimes that love shifts or ends due to a break up or a job loss; then they find themselves suffering emotions of sadness, bitterness, or anger. To be honest I don’t really think that most people understand what love truly is. The kind of love they know is more an affectionate emotion of temporary satisfaction, more than it is true love! I believe true and lasting love can only come from God as a fruit of the Spirit!
Many books have been written about the different kinds of love, Agape, Eros, Phileo, and Storge. Here are some definitions of each and some insight into their meaning.
Agapeo or Agape – This is unconditional love. This word is translated to mean charity. It means loving someone for their value as a child of God, not for what they do for you or give you. It is Godly love and when Jesus spoke of love this was the main description of love that He referred to. This kind of love can only come from God. (John 3:16). This love cannot be mustered up or demonstrated as an emotion of the soul. It is the fruit of the Spirit that Galatians 5 talks about.
Eros – I haven’t found this definition in Scripture but it is in Greek writings. The English translation would be erotic, as referring to sex. It is based mostly on physical traits. This is the kind of love that benefits the self. “This makes me feel good. This makes me happy. This makes me feel valued, etc.” It is a self centered love of sorts. This is the strong emotional attraction to another person. This emotion of love is natural and needed. Romantic love plays a big part in relationships, but this emotion of love comes and goes, and cannot stand alone and last, apart from Agape love being its grounding.
Phileo – This is love based on friendship. It is not sexual in meaning. The city of Philadelphia is called the “City of Brotherly Love” for instance. It is a give and take love, a love of admiration. Anyone can experience this kind of love. Another way to think of it is “Platonic love”. Usually both people benefit when Phileo love is present but just like Eros love, it cannot stand on its own over an extended period of time without being grounded in Agape love.
Storge – the love between family members. It is the kind of love a parent has for a child and vice versa. It is a committed, and a lot of times sacrificial, kind of love. It is an instinctual type of love. This love can be tainted if there is harm done to a family member, but most often, it is an unconditional, forgiving love shown towards family members.
We can experience all of these types of love in our relationships. If we want to have a fulfillment of them that will last a lifetime, we have to make sure that our “acts of love” are coming from our solid foundation with God, through our relationship with Jesus Christ. God has given each of these types of love to bring joy, peace, and abundance to us. Each type is a free gift that we can choose to walk in or not. God gave us the fulfillment of every type of love through Christ’s sacrifice on the Cross. Romans 5:8 says, “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
If we want to walk in the abundance of that love and experience the other types of love fully, we have to allow God’s love to envelope us and we have to understand that no matter what we do, God has a committed love for us. His Agape love does not change based on what we do, how we act, or how we think.
God’s Agape love covers a multitude of sins. (1 Peter 4:8)
God’s Agape love always protects us. (1 Corinthians 13)
Only God’s Agape love flowing through us can bring true fulfillment in life.
From that fulfillment we can walk in the other types of love, without growing weary and weak. This is only possible when those “acts of love” are an extension of God’s perfect love flowing through us by the power of His Holy Spirit. In our own strength we can muster up the energy to love in any form but we will soon find our strength waning and we will grow tired, when we suffer relationships difficulties and setbacks.
If you want to live a fulfilled life and have a love in you, that flows from the Spirit of God, it is time to become grounded in God’s perfect love for you. I know it may be scary for some of you if you have been wounded in a love relationship of any kind, but as you take this leap of faith remember 1 John 4:18, “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.” If you have a fear of loving because you have been hurt by someone you loved in the past, there is hope! My prayer is that you will come with me on this journey into understanding love from a different perspective. In order to begin this journey all you have to do accept God’s perfect love for you by faith and He will do the rest.
To be continued……………………………………
Sunday, March 1, 2009
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